How to: Worry like a pro

1. Find something to worry about, for me it is when T-rex does not call when I think he should call, this could be a few hours to a few minutes.

2. Hold phone, maybe even dial his number, but don’t call out of fear that his ringing phone will alert the bad guys to his dark hiding location behind the boxes and they will all open fire on him at once, he will have that sad cartoon look of despair as he fumbles to silence the phone, shoot, and hide all at the same time.

3. Find something to distract you, avoid the bed room, laundry room, and kitchen, all of which remind you that your cop is not home.

4. After so long, call another police wife or get on Nation Police Wife Association and whine about how annoying it is

5. Stair out the window, get grumpy whenever someone drives by in a vehicle that even might kind of in dim light look like the patrol cars.

6. Refresh all news sites 100 times an hour.

7. Give up and mentally make peace with the fact that if your cop is not hurt already he will when he gets home

8. When your cop comes home yell at him for at least 15 minutes. “Why did you not call?” and “No, I wasn’t worried I just needed to know when to start dinner” are phrases that can be repeated as often as you wish.

9. Repeat as often as needed.

Where has Yellow gone?

Yeah I ask myself the same question! I am still here. Life just got busy! I got to watch my little sister’s daughter. She is one, and so so cute! I had her for a week and miss her way too much! It really did make me want another child.

But on to other news, after all my baby need is not going to get cured anytime soon. The girls have been doing great. Spring break has kept them and me busy! T-rex has been busy working too. I think he has fallen into his grove at work. I am finding that most people in our small town are either criminals, dumb, or related to a dumb criminal. Kind of makes it hard to really get to know a lot of people. But I guess that is to be expected in a small town like this. I find that I am telling myself, almost more than I have to tell T-rex, that not everyone is a criminal…I have not made up my mind on the dumb part however. I mean I get to see a lot of the dumb stuff at the fast food place I work!

Talking of Fast food place I work. A few months ago a drunk, total drunk, came to the drive up. I can usually dismiss most of this stuff, after all “it’s not my job” blah blah blah! Well this guy really should not be on the road and I called him in. I have not heard anything yet, but I did see him get pulled over, and I know he was so drunk he likely went right to jail. Well now I find out from the great Husband of mine that because I gave dispatch my name I might get called into court. UGH?! I didn’t think they could do that. But here I was using my name to get an officer out there. . ….After all they all know I am married to T-rex. So yep Yellow name dropped her own name and for that will pay….. maybe. I don’t know yet, and it has already been a few months I think I would have heard something by now. Anyway I will keep you all posted if anything more comes of that. Until then I have learned my lesson…. don’t name drop, not even your own name!

Other than that cop work has seemed to take on a more normal role with T-rex being on the day shift. I am not sure I like it. It seems he has to deal with a lot more dumb stuff. Nothing that fun happens during the day, but a lot of people like to report silly dumb things.

I guess we did have a close call with another standoff. T-rex was sad his SWAT team didn’t get called out to it. Mostly he likes to say how different he would have done things. Eh, when it is a small town and the most fun you have is booking in a cow I guess missing something big stinks. I am just happy things have been fairly “slow” or at least that he has dealt with more dumb people than criminals.

How the Wii Saved my Marriage . . . . . and Destroyed it

I keep telling T-rex and my mom that I am going to write a book called “How the Wii Saved my Marriage . . . . . .And Destroyed it." But I don’t think I have enough material for a book. Perhaps a movie would be better, too much action not enough dialoged for a book. Mostly things like “Ohh you are a jerk!” And “Big baby” are repeated over and over again.

We got a Wii for the kids a few months ago. I was sure that the 6 and 5 year old would love it. And I am still sure they would love it if we ever let them play. But when T-rex is home, and I have a free moment we play Super Mario Brothers. The new one has a coin battle, and it is great! This is one of the few things T-rex and I can do together anymore with our busy lives. Sitting down and fighting in a silly game. We yell at each other, I hate to say some “colorful” words get said, teasing, and very poor sportsmanship make up the night. We are not nice at all. I can see how people would split up over a game, well the way we play anyway.

Even with all the fighting and yelling it is one thing that I think has helped to bring us together more. We were going about our lives with very few, if any, activities that we did together. Sure he would come home and watch TV or play the X-box and I would sit in the same room and do homework. We do still need that “together and alone” sometimes that is really needed. But we also really needed something to do together, even if it is just yell insults at each other.

So if you hear yelling and cursing coming from my house don’t worry, we are just falling in love.

Do you girls (and guys) have something silly like that in your life that helps keep your relationship alive?

How to: get blood out work pants

1. Freak out that there is blood on his pants

2. Demand that he strip them off in the backyard, garage, or other location as far away from you as he can.

3. Have him put all his clothing in a big paper bag

4. Add some newspaper to the bag (helps absorb the blood)

5. Set bag in outside grill, fireplace, or other such location

6. Light bag on fire

7. Walk away happy to help

8. Find out when he is yelling about burnt pants that it was only fake blood used for training and he was messing around with you

9. Say “well that should teach you”

10. Pay no attention to his questions on why you never asked if he was okay. Truth is if he is not missing a body part when he comes home you will still have to deal with crazy pranks like this and it’s nothing to get too excited about anymore.

Such a show off

T-rex got assigned to read to the kids at a school in the county. He loved it! I don’t think he has bragged so much about work in a long time. I loved it!

He said he did some questions and passed around his flashlight, and handcuffs. He should have known better, two boys got cuffed together before the end of it. He got to show off his truck. Every kid loves the lights. I think part of it is the little kids looked up to him; he was still a hero in their eyes. They have not been pushed into hating the cops like so many older people do. Maybe he was able to reach a kid and someday they will stand up for the cops and not turn to the cop hate like so many of their peers.

T-rex called me to tell me how much fun he had when I was off at the library with our own children. At the time I was just happy he had a good day at work. It seems like this last week it has been a lot of the same old same old and that can drain a person. But after I got to think about it I was a little upset.

He was off having fun with a bunch of 3rd graders and here his children were without him again. I guess I got a little jealous. He shared more with that class then he does with his own children. And then it hit me. We try to protect our children from his job. Right or wrong, we don’t want them to see all the things he has to deal with. Sure they have all been cuffed together, seen his flashlight, played with the lights on his truck, and have a good understanding of his job.

I knew he was going to do a great job reading to the class because he does great with our own children. He understands how to talk to kids. He is a great father, and a wonderful husband. I just wish that he was home more. I guess that is a wish all police wives have. So yes I was jealous that a bunch of 3rd graders got my husband’s attention for a few hours. But I was so proud of him. Simple little things like talking to children really can have an impact. And keeping some of this stuff from our children right now is the right thing to do. They will see far more “cop crap” in their lives. Far more than anyone ever needs to see I am sure. And for now it is nice to see T-rex brag about a good day at work!

Sunday Drive

Well our Sunday drives are often times on Tuesdays or Fridays, or whenever T-rex has a day off. But still. It reminded me of when I was a child and my dad would shove us kids into the too small car for the too long drive. We would go to random places, usually out of town. We would find small diners, dirty gas stations, and fields, or for a time mountains. The parents would talk and me and my sisters would complain, enjoy the sites, and even bond a little.

When I was dating T-rex we would go for drives too. I remember driving in the rain, listening to some country singer, and then he threw my shoe out the window. I think he wanted to get me to dance with him. It was silly and romantic and annoying. I knew I loved him.

Our last little Sunday drive was on a Monday. We drove out to the country; you know the whole mile it takes to get there. The air was fresh and clean. I loved it. We saw some great looking county houses! I now have a new dream, to own a small farm. Okay how about I be realistic, I want a house that is near a farm. . . I don’t really want to farm! I want to let the kids run in a field, chase a chicken, find arrowheads and run from snakes. I don’t want to drive a tractor, battle black birds, or milk a cow. I don’t know the first thing about farms. I just know that I want it.

The drive was great. I hope that we get to do a few more before gas prices go way to high!