10 things I have learned this year:

1.       Sitting on a house does not require a ladder.

2.       Badge bunnies fall into one of three groups

a.       Stupid

b.      Young and stupid

c.       Creepy

3.       If you say “I hope you are not late tonight” or in any other way refer to your husband being late, he will be late.

4.       College is a total pain, but so worth it

5.       A strong support group is needed when life turns crummy.

6.       The general public does not understand anything about police work

7.       Friends will defriend you for defending the police. (say that 3 times fast)

8.       Your first date of the year is likely to get interrupted by a tornado, or criminal

9.       When your husband starts to talk to a random guy and you have to question if it’s a fellow cop or ex-criminal it could go either way.

10.   Spanish is hard, as it is one thing I didn’t learn this year that I should have.

Oh What? I have a blog?

So, I have been out of things for a little.  How about a recap of the last few weeks and I will write more when I really have time:

1.       I kissed Mighty Mouse

2.       I did okay with Thanksgiving!

3.       T-rex has had way too much vacation this year

4.       I applied to Grad school, then changed my mind and am applying to get a second BA in History so I can teach high school kids.  . .I was sober when making this choice!!

5.       I have thought of starting another blog so I can give my political rants . . . but changed my mind because as we can see I don’t keep up here enough.

6.       I went a little crazy on another driver

7.       And I graduate mid December!  I am going to have an “I am not going to stand in line at graduation graduation party. “

Some times I feel old . . .But not all the time.

When married to a cop you are really married to man of 3 ages.

Your husband is 10, 17, and 71 all at the same time

The 10 year old says things like “Look its shinny!” and “I want a bigger one!”

The 17 year old says things like “I get to carry a gun” and “I love to drive fast!!”

The 71 year old says things like “Get off my grass!” and “Stop driving so fast!”

As I am not 10, 17, or 71 this could become an issue.  When I am 33 things might even out.  I can hope, until then just knowing what age he is at the moment will help. Here are some things to help you during the age changes your cop will make during the day

When he is 10: “Turn of the games and get your work done!”

When he is acting 17: “No, you cannot go out and party tonight!”

And when he is 71 there is not much hope as he doesn’t really have a hearing aid yet he will not listen to you.

How to tell if your Cop is really sick:

1.       He actually uses sick time!

2.       He turns off his radio, and cell phone

3.       When sirens go off he doesn’t care

4.       He stops acting like a baby

5.       The man flu would be an improvement

6.       He is willing to loss a court case because he doesn’t feel well enough to go

T-rex took sick time for the first time in 5 years!  I don’t know if I should be happy he took my advice for once or worry that he is so sick.

He's on nights, he knows nothing.

There is actually a lot going on right now.  Just none of it really “blog worthy.”  Or maybe I don’t want to take the energy to type it all out?  I don’t really know. 

I think life gets like that for all of us.  It takes energy to give a darn, and well I just don’t wana anymore!

T-rex is also on his last week of night.  .. I hope!  I forget. Nights are great weeks 2-4 but too much after that and I start to want my husband back!  I am a lucky one our guys change shifts about every 6 weeks.  I am one of the unlucky ones, our guys change shifts about every 6 weeks.  There is good and bad in it.  I like that for 6 weeks I get to have dinner with him, for 6 weeks he is home to help send the kids off to school, for another 6 weeks we are going to bed around the same time!  I like that he is not stuck on night for a year or more at a time, that would not be fun.

But there is a very big issue with him changing hours every 6 weeks.  Every 6 weeks everyone has to readjust. Dino usually ends up sleep walking during the first week of the change, Rae whines a lot more, and Lilly turns into nasty Diva (Yeah she is at that age, but I am still going to say it’s because of the change in hours).  Everyone’s sleep is also affected. Then we get into our grove and it changes again, which isn’t so bad because by the time we are really in our grove I am sick of it. I am sick of feeling like a single parent all the time, I am sick of seeing my husband in passing moments, I am sick of not being able to wash the sheets because someone is always sleeping! 

Yesterday we talked about some of this, not the sheets, but the other stuff.

T-rex is mostly a laid back kind of guy, which helps a lot.  He doesn’t get to really be a part of the household most of the time.  Mostly when he is on night he can go a week without seeing the kids for more than 5 minutes, he often times has no clue what is going on when I change everything in the house, and I don’t even think he knows what time dance is for the girls.  It is just how it is. I hate to say it but often times I do things that a couple would do without him.  Like sign our daughter up for preschool. Or get the girls a new bed. I do try and let him know what is going on.  But truly if we didn’t make a real effort he wouldn’t know anything!

I do have to say when T-rex is home (no matter how rare) he makes the effort to know what is going on. If he didn’t I might not know what to tell him because I am so used to him not being around.  I don’t plan things with him, or around him, we just go and do it. If he can make it great, if not oh well. I have to live like that; he has gotten calls out with no more than a 30 second warning. Things would be far harder if I put everything on hold for him.

Still I like to think he knows what is going on around the house, and when I can I seek his thoughts. Like with the new beds, I went down town to look at them, picked them out, had the guy ring me up and then called T-rex to come pay for them!  See he knows what’s up!

Some things are just not normal. . . . .

Like my children.

I mean they fit in at home, and that might not be the best of things.

Take Rae for instance.   . . .

Last week we saw a small aquarium. The turtle looked dead.  She announced it very loud, the other little girl started to cry, her father gave me dirty looks as I laughed.

She asked her father yesterday if he had to shoot anyone, like this was a normal question to ask.

We went to story time where they were reading “There was an old lady who swallowed a fly.”  First I have to say that story is a little morbid for 3 year olds . . .Or at least it seems that way now.  Rae assured everyone the lady did die. When the teacher said the old lady still had her mouth open so she was asleep Rae informed everyone that she does not sleep with her mouth open, but she dies that way.

I am sure some of this is normal 3 year old wonders.  Yet I can’t help but feel that some of this is because we face the dangers, the bad, and death every day.  We girls standby ready to support T-rex in all he does, and with that we get a small glimpse at the ugly in the world.

Although we do our best to protect our children from many of the dangers in the world it is hard to kiss daddy goodbye without noticing the gun at his side.  Part of me worries the girls see the danger and icky stuff to much.  Another, bigger part of me thinks that the world is turning into a bunch of PC babies. The girls brought home the book “Little Red Riding Hood”  Did you know in the end the wood cutter guy does not kill the wolf with his ax? They don’t all have a nice BBQ later anymore?! 

Okay the BBQ part might never have been in there, but it was in my mind.  I do know in the story I read as a child the wolf got cut up, died, and everyone was happy!  Now he gets shipped off to a wildlife preserve where he is feed a nice vegan meal three times a day. (Or something just as silly)

So the girls are not big softies, (unless there is a bug.  .I mean eww) But that is okay. I like it this way. I would rather they grow up knowing that there are dangers, death, and bad guys than for them to be so afraid of anything and everything that is not nice. Life is not nice.

haha they will make fun of you! cause now you are one of the guys.

So T-rex has a “2011 taco” that he drives for work .. . Okay it’s not really a taco but that’s what the girls call it so I am going with that. 

He has not even had the thing for a year!  And yet he has already had his first accident.  The way he tells it the pole just jumped out of nowhere and ran right into him! 

Okay even he doesn’t tell it like that. I guess he was back-up on the interstate and had to flip around to get to town. When he did he side swiped a pole.  He almost made it a year without any damage to a vehicle I think he is doing good!

He had to do the whole, write a report, and hide it on the boss’s desk behind other papers so no one woud see it.  Then he spent some time in the garage cleaning it up, and making it look like nothing happened.  So far I think he has been safe and no one has made fun of him too much.  Well until I post this!

But to be fair he does drive a lot more than I do, and it was dark, and the pole was painted green.  And well he is still a rookie. .. . Or he was until he just made ranks with all the other guys who have ran into things with their vehicles.

Life goes on

I hate that T-rex misses so much of our lives. I also wonder at times if I am not a little too active in the children’s activities. I mean, I sit here and wonder how people have a job?!  It would drive me crazy to not be there for every little thing that happens in their lives. And then I think that is not healthy, and I need a job, like yesterday! No matter what life goes on, the kids will keep going and playing. 

Unless they are Dino, and then things might be up in the air.  This kid has no clue how lucky she is. It was a typical busy Friday, homecoming here!  The kids got out of school early, and the older two were going to ride on a float for the parade. But Dino had to run back to class to get something.  She looked, she walked, and she nearly got ran over.

I can play it over and over again in my head, but I can’t put words to it.  There is nothing like watching your child’s life flash before your eyes. It is not an exaggeration when I say she had her feet under the top of the car before it stopped.  The car was going slow, and just looked both ways, and was just making her way across.  She didn’t do anything wrong.  Dino, looked saw the car was stopped at the cross walk and just started to walk, she didn’t do anything wrong. I just wish that they would have noticed a few feet before they did.

What bothered me the most I think wasn’t her reaction, or how close she was to being hurt, logically I now know that she would have been hurt, but no more than when she runs into the wall. My reaction is what still gets to me. I just froze and screamed.  I had never yelled so much, and yet I couldn’t move my feet at all. When it was all done and over with she was okay, she was across the street and I was still standing where I was.  I told the driver she is okay like 50 times, and thought I was okay.  And I was, until someone walked buy and said “that was scary.” Then I broke down and cried my eyes out.

T-rex would have run over there, pushed the car away, carried his baby girl to safety, and then ticketed everyone within hearing distance.  T-rex is cool like that.  Still life goes on.  T-rex can’t be there for everything that happens, and neither can I.  I have to trust that the kids will keep being okay, even if Dino has more close calls than most. Dino had a C-scan every year for the first 3 years of her life. We truly are lucky.

UGH and good news!

Well first the good news!  Ammo in The Dryer was on the radio!!  Well an internet radio station, which totally rocks!  Check it out http://www.spreaker.com/page#!/show/get_clear we are down a little ways, but that is because of the UGH news.

I hate being sick.  You never do hear people say “I love having a cold!”  And true part of me thinks a nice flu would be great right now, I could really use the time off.  I know the truth; there is no time off when you are sick wife of a cop.  Unless the cop has a few days off!  And T-rex did!  So I have spent a few days doing NOTHING. And I love it, and the house is a mess, and I don’t care.

I once came across a page for the man flu.  .. Google it. I think I got it, which is strange because I am not a man.  But this cold really kicked my butt.  Although hearing Dino tattle on me to her sisters was great.

“You should see mommy room!  It is so messy!  There are tissues all over! She needs to clean it up.”

Yeah kid!  Thanks, I will keep that in mind the next time you are sick.  Then all the girls go “ewww” at once. 

So now that I am doing better I am going to clean the room before a kid tattles on me again.  And maybe get the rest of the house in order.  But in my absence check out the Get Clear show!  There is a lot of great stuff on her show to get you thinking . . . and anyone willing to say hello to Ammo In the Dryer is great!

The cop voice.

T-rex made fun of me the other day for getting an “accent” when I talk business on the phone.  I guess I get into it a little. I also know I have a “mom voice” and I am sure I have used it on T-rex to get him to take out the trash from time to time.

My dad would use his drill-sergeant voice when I was in trouble. My mom was mast of “the look” she also has a “life coach voice” although I am sure she will deny it.  The different voices come out from time to time.  Most of the time we don’t even know we are doing it. But to play a role in life we often times use a voice also. It’s okay I am sure everyone has a different voice for a few things in life. 

Last night T-rex called and used his Cop Voice. I don’t much like the cop voice. It means work. It means he is going to be late. It means I am not to ask questions. I hate it. 

T-rex in cop voice: “I am going to be late. Got a (some strange 10 code). Bye”

Me: “Bye , I LOVE YOU!”

I am not sure he got the last part. He was in work mode. I was happy I got the call. Sometimes he cannot call. Sometimes he is just late.  But the calls always leave me on edge when he uses cop voice. Cop voice is never a really good thing.

An hour a two later I get another call.  Not as much cop voice I liked it better.

T-rex: “Go to bed babe, I am going to be another hour or so. I will tell you about it when I get home.”

Me: “Okay, I love you, stay safe.”

T-rex: “I will, Goodnight, I love you too.”

Next thing I know he is coming home.  I still don’t know what happened, but he seems okay. He is sleeping.  After he came home I remember him sitting and saying he will sleep in his truck for another 30 minutes in case the other officer needed help.  I think that might have been a dream. But if his cop voice is getting in my dreams I might have issues. . .

All alone. .. . . .

The kids all started school.  Well, Rae starts in about one hour from the time I have started to write this. Already I feel alone. T-rex is working mids this month, so I can see him a little in the morning when Rae is still home, and then Tuesdays and Thursdays if T-rex is working, I really will have the house to myself!

Sure this is not that big of a deal, I mean I am sure people live all over the world where they are not being bugged by someone 24/7.  You know a world where people can do the dishes all at once, without being asked to help with a dress, the bathroom, or break up a fight.  I am sure there is a world where people can take a bath in peace, where they can read a book, watch a show, vacuum, or even stare at a wall in peace. 

I don’t live in that world. I have not lived in that world for a very long time. The first thing on my list is to stare at the wall! But I bet T-rex will call me, he always calls me. I love him for that, even if it does drive me crazy.

The older two have been in school for about a week, they love it.  They are making friends, learning stuff, and hyper when they get home.  Rae can really use some time to make friends, and she is so happy to start school.  I am the one who is having a hard time.  I am happy for her and I know she will do a great job. But something about my baby going off to school is just hard.  I guess it is hard for a lot of mothers.  I am just happy this is only pre-school.  I am going to flip when they all go off to college!

8 years.

Time sure goes fast.  8 years ago today I married the best Man EVER!  He is kind and caring, and well let’s face it he puts up with me!

He has been in Law Enforcement for the last 6 years.  Before that he was gone doing road construction.

Maybe that is why time seems to have gone so fast. I don’t know.  I asked him yesterday if there as anything he would change. He said no. Well maybe we would have been smarter with money. But what family doesn’t say that?

I can’t say there is much I would change.  Because if I were to change one thing then who knows what else that would have changed, and we have a great life together!  

It has been a great anniversary. The days before we went on Vacation, saw my parents, and even had time for date!

Today (which is really the day after our anniversary) Dino and Lilly start school. First and second grade already!  It has been a great year.  I love you T-rex!!

Hippies and drunks

Sounds like normal dinner conversation around here.

T-rex called me to laugh about his latest call.  Hippies, no like real hippies, not this generation hippy, but like the 60 kind . . . just as old too.  Something about rebelling in you 70’s just isn’t as cool.  There were some things my parents were right about. Hippies weren’t doing anything illegal, or too bad, just being strange.

He came home late, not that I noticed, or cared until he woke me up. Drunks were walking around the county, out of city limits so he had to deal with it. He should have just left em to get ran over, but being the good guy he is, he took care of it. And this is typical. Late because of something so dumb, busy because people in a small town can’t stand strange people. I think he has gotten a call saying something like “this guy is from the city and looks funny.”  He has to go check it out, because as crazy as society is you never know.

I wish he could deal with society how I deal with the kids when they start to cry.  Two questions are asked before I move. 

“Hey whoever is crying!  Are you bleeding?” 

“Are you on fire?”

If the answers are no then I don’t move. 

I guess I should ask “Is a bone broken?”  But eh

T-rex could ask questions like

“are you drunk?”

“Is your IQ above that of a tree?”

“is there a gun in your face. . like right now?”

And if the answers are no then T-rex does not have to go out.  Sometimes I think it might do a person good to not have a cop right there to help them out of their mess.  But then again it is great to know that no matter what T-rex will be there to help. . . .

Very odd

A Cop on vacation is a very odd thing.  Not sure how Much I love this.  It is great to see him, but very odd to have him in the house! 

If we last the rest of this vacation month we might make it a yearly thing.  . .I think I could only do this once a year!

We're roommates until Friday.

Growing up my dad gave me some good advice and a lot of bad advice too!  But one thing he told me that had always stuck with me was that people can be married and happy without being IN love as long as they love each other.  

This stuck with me because when I got married I was not in the butterfly mad love. I just loved T-rex, I knew that no matter what happened in life I would always care about him, and somehow I knew I would be able to put up with him. 

I am not sure he always feels like he can put up with me.

I think the added stress of being a police officer, the long hours, strange hours, and typical stress that only a cop’s wife knows about makes it harder. We are learning to deal with these things and still find times when we can be IN love. Yet it is hard. And it really seems that when T-rex is feeling the love I am feeling like a roommate. 

We have found the schedule that works best for both of us, typically nights. We have found the things we need to do for each other to make this work. T-rex has to give me a day off every now and again. I also have to stop getting on him about house stress the minute he comes home. Like all things there needs to be a balance. 

I have seen too many fall into divorce because they are still working on the balance, or even more than that they fall into the roommate phase and think something is wrong with that. There is nothing wrong with that in itself. It becomes a problem when there really is no way getting out if it. But even then with a little work falling in love is not too hard.

All things have ups and downs.  I think the ups and downs are a little closer together, and a little bigger with cops.

So yeah we might be little more than roommates until Friday, work, kids and life get in the way.  But in the end We are always husband and wife. I love you T-rex!

Hang on babe, I lost my Gun

So, we had a bad night of storms.  First T-rex, the kids and I went for a drive but had to cut it short because of the tornados just a county over.  The sky looked nasty.  When we got home the children and I bunked out in the basement as T-rex stayed up stairs to keep an eye on the weather. 

The power went out after about 15 minutes; we made it home just in time.  Candles were going, and all was well. Until I saw the inch or so of water just creeping in under the baseboards.  T-rex came down to see how we were doing, and help mop up the water. It was stressful.  Why is it that children always get in the way MORE when parents are stressing out?  We would get towels down for one spot of the basement to find another flooding. Our bedrooms are all in the basement, our computer, T.V. and with little kids’ rooms it seemed every corner that was flooding was also a place to hide cloths!

About 20 minutes later the power turned back on, and we spent another 20 with the carpet cleaner getting more water up.   With everything as dry as we could get it, and the children in bed T-rex and I went upstairs for a movie and time to relax before the next storm came in. 

I noticed there was his ammo clip just sitting on the end table. One bullet out like he had been messing around with his gun, trigger pulls, aiming, or something like that.  But no gun was to be found.

T-rex lost it when the power went out!!

Somehow this seemed perfectly natural and normal.  No not that he misplaces his gun a lot! But that something like this would happen.

As I was looking in the typical places I realized that there is not a typical place to misplace a gun!  Not like my cell phone which ends up in the bathroom closet a lot, or the keys which end up on the wrong kitchen counter from time to time, or even the remote which has a habit of being found in the refrigerator. Nope, no place seemed like a natural place for a gun to go missing off to.  Yet we knew it had to be in the house someplace.   

How many families would loss a gun and just laugh about it?  We did!  We knew it was unloaded, and that the kids were in bed so we had time to look, we also knew that if one of the children did find it they would come and tell us.  But I think most people would have been worried at least a little.

We found it in less than 5 minutes.  It had fallen behind the couch when he got up to come help me down stairs.  I think that is one part of being married to a cop I will never fully get used to.

  My dad always had guns, we had them hanging from the wall when I was little. But there was a fear of guns put into me and my sisters.  I have to say I don’t much like gun.  I know how to shoot, and I do okay. But you can tell I am afraid of the thing by the way I hold it.  T-rex holds his gun like it’s his best friend; they are buddies and pals and might go out for drinks after work!  I guess that is a good thing, because that gun might save his life . . . if he knows where it’s at!

A cop’s guide a spouses Birthday:

I have had the worst birthdays in the past years. T-rex has been working, has been gone, and has gone golfing!

The kids are a mess, we are always broke, and I end up making my own cake, and not going out.

Yet part of this I am sure is my fault, because I usually also forget my birthday is coming up until like the day of it. Call it mom brain, but I think I get it from my Father.

So this year I am going to help T-rex out, and all the other Cop’s who need to help with their wife’s birthday, even on a cop’s pay!

1.       If you can get the day off of work!

2.       Don’t go play golf!

3.       If you cannot make a cake, go get one! This can even be the only thing you buy her this year.

4.       Cook every meal you can, or go out.  But if a sitter is needed you get it! And pick a place you think she will like.  But the point is DON’T bug her with it.  Just make sure food is provided during the day.

5.       Let your wife lock herself in her room, nap, eat cake, and ignore the children even if it is just for a few hours.

6.       Don’t let the house fall apart when she is away from it all!

7.       Invite a few close friends over for BBQ, or pizza. Nothing to fancy unless she wants that. But friends so she knows it was cool she was born

8.       Run a bath for her, light a few candles.

9.       GET A CARD! Or make one, but something with words about love and funny stuff.

10.   Let her sleep in, you can run the kids to school, and taken them on ALL the errands.

Okay so mostly this applies to Stay at home moms who are married to a cop. . . Maybe this is just what I want this year. .  .think it’s a good enough hint?  I tell ya, before I had kids my parties may not have been big, but I didn’t have little children trying to eat my cake!

Taser, not a gun, same rules apply!!

Teaching kids, all kids, about gun safety is important. I find that we have to go over the rules about once a week with our young children, 7, 6, and 3. They tend to forget things from time to time. Still, they have done a very good job.  They know they cannot touch T-rex’s gun, or any gun, they know they should treat every gun like it could kill someone, and all that good stuff. 

T-rex also does a good job at keeping his guns out of reach. I wish I could say the same about his Taser!  He came home for lunch today, which is always nice.  Until he leaves something at home. . . like his Taser!

Dino came from cleaning the bathroom holding it up at me. “Daddy left his traser here!” (Yes she says it with the extra R).

I have to say I panicked a little.  I didn’t know where he was, it can take almost an hour for him to get back home if he is on the other side of the county, and I did know if he needed.  But more than anything I didn’t want to get Tased!

We have now had to expand the gun rules to apply to Tasers.  We might have to expand the rules to apply to anything that is related to daddy’s work.  . . .Don’t touch it, get an adult!

Yeah, I know, All Cops are Jerks.

Title says it all right?

I was talking with a friend of mine, who did not have a good experience with cops and as she was telling me her story all I could think was yeah it sounds like that officer(s) is a total jerk. And although I can see why a police officer would take the stand he did. I don’t think it is right.  Furthermore it was not just one officer being extra safe with his life it was 4 officers not looking at the situation, and just treating everyone like a criminal.

Don’t get me wrong, I would rather T-rex look like a jerk and come home than be extra nice to everyone and get himself hurt.  But there is balance. And I am sick of hearing stories that make me think cops are just being jerks. 

Even more than that I hate the fight this starts with T-rex and I.  It is petty but he is unwilling to listen to anything where the LAWs in place are wrong, where the cops should just chill out, and where what he might have done is not something I agree with.  I support my husband all the way, but I also know him, and I know he is kind nice and loving and anything less that than, even for the job, can be upsetting. 

Still, stay safe guys, but don’t treat the criminals like they are less than human; unless they really are. . . .

You guys will think I am crazy.

I have avoided posting this for a few reasons.  But you know when you find something life changing you just want to share it with everyone?  Well that is what has happened to me.  I am sure some of my readers are going to think I am crazy, but really that is not anything new.

I recently joined a company named Livinity.  I am loving all of it!  I could spend hours talking to people about it, but I am not going to have Livinity take over my blog.  Still I would feel bad if I didn’t share this great deal with everyone I know.

First let me tell you a little about me and the history I have with the company.  2 years ago I was sick of being stuck at home and making no money, and just stressed from the husband’s job and two little kids.  I was looking at all kinds of work at home jobs, most of them just didn’t fit with me, cost too much to get in, or like the few I did do it was very hard to make any money. 

 My girls dance teacher told me a little about Livinity, she asked me to come see a presentation and I feel in love. However, it was going to take me a few days to get the funds to join. During that time life happened and I never did join.  A few weeks later the company announced new bonuses that everyone who was in the company already would qualify for. I felt like I had missed my chance.  A year later the company ran a promotion which I misread. I walked down to join but was $30.00 short.  The husband didn’t get paid for two more days, a day after the promotion ended. I had missed it again.  The same day the company announced that anyone currently in the company was going to get a % of the company’s profits for life.  Now sure it might be just .004% or whatever, I don’t know but the fact that the company does that is really cool.

So when they announced that anyone can join right now for just $10.00 I jumped on it. I did whatever I could to get in. I figure at this point even if something happens and I hate it I am not out that much, but I know the potential this company has.  If anyone is looking for a part time gig to get some extra money, or something to do during the day, or motivation or whatever check it out.  I am sure some are going to think I have lost it.  But I have never felt better in my life.  The promotion ends the end of this month. So I am sorry I have taken so long to share it.

http://www.livinity.com/destiny

http://live.livinity.com

Oh and in other news T-rex even likes it which is strange.

Idiots Happen

So you guys already know my crazy reason for not callingT-rex when he is late. 

Yesterday I was talking to T-rex’s mom.  I was telling her how t-rex was going to be in this little town at 6 when he got off work so he could pick up and bring home food from a great restaurant at 6 when they open. The town is about 20 minutes away and the guys get to bring their trucks home. So he was just going to stop charging the S.O. for time at 6 like normal pick up the food and drive right home.  It was not a busy day and he was not likely to get called out to anything.

But he was late.  Very late. Every few minutes when I was talking to T-rex’s mom I told her he was late. I guess it really was starting to get to me.  She said I should I call him, she was sick of me whining.  I told her my crazy reason for never calling when he is late.  She said to just call him.  I did call him. I ended up calling both phones he has, he didn’t pick up. Yes, let the panic set it!  It was past 7, he should have been home at like 6:30. Something happened.  I was a worried mess, it does not help that the road to that town freaks me out. 

It took him a whole 5 minutes or more to call me back.  All he said for himself was “Idiots Happen.” Turns out that on his drive home some well known clients stopped him on the side of the highway drunk beyond reason and said they needed a ride into town.  Then he started to tell me the technical stuff like how he dealt with it and calling someone on duty and blah blah, but because he was in his work truck and in uniform he had to stop and help.  And he couldn’t pick up the phone because he was telling the new officer what was going on.

When he did get home 15 minutes later he said this was bound to happen, we tried to cheat the system to get food home.  not that what he did was all that bad, we have seen the guys stop to get milk if they live out of town, or run a simple errand if they have time. It is not that big of a deal. But T-rex has always made sure he is out of uniform as soon as he can be, and the one time he plans something, he gets work to do.  He said he couldn’t bring himself to change the S.O. for it.  Karma I guess, although not really.  I mean Idiots are going to happen, and in his line of work idiots happen alot, and in our small town idiots seem to be able to find us.  But whatever.

Do your husbands’ come home in uniform, or with their patrol car?  Do they ever stop to get milk on the way home?  Is it really that strange that T-rex did this? He is able to be in any town in our county when working, so stopping work and driving right home wasn’t like he was adding more miles or using the car to run a lot of errands or anything. 

How to Iron a Uniform (updated)

1.       Don’t do it!

If you find that you Have to do it because of one of the following reasons go to step two:

1.       Your husband ran over his own hand

2.       Your husband recently bunt his hand making you food at midnight at your request

3.       You woke up to find that your husband has cleaned the whole house, dumped all the trash, did the wash, folded it and put it all away, the bathroom is clean, and the kids are dressed and matching!

I also say if this ever happens have your husband stay out of lighting and got a lotto ticket, or you do, because one of you has some very strange luck

2.       Don’t Do IT!  Take the uniform the dry cleaners!

Few things should stop you from being able to take the uniform to the cleaners. If however you find one of the following please go to step three:

1.       The drycleaners was a target for some ninja spies and now is just a pile of rubble

2.       A swarm of killer bees has taken over the whole block and you are highly allergic

3.       Your husband has recently arrested the dry cleaner, his wife and their teenage son, they also look like the type to know how to put out a hit.

Now depending on where you live number 3 might be a possibility, but again if the first two happen go get a lotto ticket and stay out of storms.

3.       Don’t do it!

Here are a few ways to still avoid the iron, some may work for you, some may take too much time, but all worth a little effort.

 

1.       Go visit your mother or mother –in-law if you can, mother-in-laws might love the opportunity to show you how you have been messing up her sons uniform.  Enjoy it, you get out of ironing.

2.       Buy him a new uniform from a company that already sends the pants out pressed.

3.       Before the terrible things could happen to make you HAVE to iron spray everything with a lot of starch and only wash when you HAVE to.

4.       Join the city commissioners or city council or whatever group votes on silly things like uniforms and push for soft, wash and wear uniforms.  .push hard.

5.       Drive the hour to the next closest dry cleaners

If all of that fails you can try your best to iron the thing, send him off to work in it anyway. Then go out and get a new newspaper and some coffee. Highlight all the drycleaners in the area, a few new places to rent for cheap, and whatever jobs you or he might be interested in.  Have all of this ready for your husband when he comes home from work all upset that he got grief for his uniform.

A year Ago

It was one year ago that I posted my first post in the blog world. I thought that I would, ya know, write something deep and profound. I have not. I have had fun instead! I have loved getting to know other police wives. I have really liked making fun of T-rex ;)

A lot has changed in just one year. Last year at this time T-rex was gone for his 6 months of training. We were new to the whole being a deputy thing, now it is old news. He knows his job now, and I know most of what to expect. . . .Which is don’t have any expectations.

I remember the first time he put on his uniform for work. Just so you know he still looks as hot as ever all dressed up. I wish I could say that all the fears went away, but just like the giddy feeling when he is dressed and ready to go it stayed.

I still worry that he is going to get hurt at work, I still stress when I don’t see him, and I still hate the fact that I don’t get to have dinner with him every night. I guess some things don’t really change. Yet, I don’t worry or stress near as much as I once did. I have learned to just let go of that and keep going.

I wish I knew what helped get past some of the silly worry. Just time I guess. Time has changed a lot. The department he works for has dealt with a lot of changes the last year, our family has too. I have worked, gone to school, stayed home with the kids, and held down the fort. Still we are growing also.

As long as we keep learning, and keep going forward I think we are doing great. Still it is nice to look back on the year and laugh at some of the silly things that happened, some of the silly things I have stressed about. And just enjoy that this year T-rex is home.

Why T-rex will stay in the basement from now on.

T-rex and I have this grill we have been trying to sale. In a last ditch effort I put it online, really cheap just to get the thing out of here. We got one call on it. The girl really sounded like she wanted it. T-rex said he would hold it for her. She came to get it today. It went something like this:

Nice Lady: “Hi! I am just going to run and get some cash, this is a really nice grill!”

T-rex: “Oh that sounds great. . . .um. . .” (He is looking her over, and she is looking him over.)

Nice Lady: “Do I know you from somewhere?”

T-rex: “I was thinking the same thing. . . .. I work for the Sheriff’s department.”

Nice Lady: (stomps foot, hand on the hips) “You pulled me over! Last week you pulled me over!”

T-rex: (Look of doom) “Um yeah, on 40?. . . . Hey I gave you a warning!!!” (Some how that made everything better.)

Everyone then laughed as the nice lady just had a look of shock on her face saying “you pulled me over!” often. T-rex was very red in the face. It takes a lot to shake the man, but I don’t think he saw this one coming.

I told him he might want to give out a few more warnings, if that is what saved his butt. Or saved the sale. Still left him red faced. I think it might be best if he stay in the basement until we know he has not pulled our guests over.

What does a cop do to spend time with his family?

Why go to the shooting range, duh!

Well at least that is what T-rex did with his day off. Now picture this, a 7 year old who is afraid of, well almost everything, a little 3 year old who is just as cute as can be, and then Dino the 5 year old tom boy in a pink tutu.

Dino is daddy’s little girl. Dino went on the bullet at the fair with her dad, she likes purple dresses, playing in dirt, and now we can add shooting to the list!

She started out great with my old single shoot .22. It was the only gun my dad could get me to shoot and he gave it to me when I moved out on my own. I guess it was his way of getting me to protect myself, and he knew that is all I would ever shoot; too bad the sights are off on it. Dino shot that just fine, then the AR came out. T-rex got her to lie down and shot. She did great! She also got to shot his off duty something or another pistol. Yes I don’t know. Anyway here is a short video of my little 5 year old having a great time with some ammo!

You can see her little feet go up in joy.  She loved it!!

One of the casings came back and hit her in the leg; she had a little burn from it and still kept going. I wonder if I should worry or just be happy she is taking after her father. My parents say when she is president at least we would have the NRA vote and the right to keep our guns! Oh yeah you didn't know, My parents are starting Dino's Run for the presidency already. 2040!!! 

Why I hate the news . . . . .

There are too many reasons to list

Every now and again a story will hit close to home for me. It might be about a child, and every mother feels for children who are hurt. It might be a story about something from my home town, or worse yet a town close to here. It doesn’t really matter what the story is, sometimes the news just gets to me.

I know a family that watches the news every day, ALL day. I also know a family that does not watch the news at all. They are like 3 days late to BIG news! I don’t really know the connection but the family that does not watch news is far more successful than the family that does. Still I think we as a nation need to be informed. The news doesn’t really do that, but it is the best thing we have so far.

I try to follow news stories that apply to me and my family. So local news, news about cops, news about sociology (HA! Yeah right, I already get enough of that in college), and news about family stuff and such. I let the rest alone. The bad thing about local news is it all hits close to home, the bad thing with news about cops is um, that also hits close to home.

So far I guess I should count myself lucky there have not been any local news stories about cops . . . well other than that one and it was not too good.

After I posted this me and the family went on a walk and it hit me that I left this with the thought that Our Local cops here in my town had some bad news.  No, they did not.  It was Local in the idea that we sadly knew of some of the people and we could drive there. . . In a small town like this that is close to local ;)  T-rex's department has not had any bad news in the time he has been here.  I hope it stays that way. 

Here let me share my husband with you and your family.

T-rex had to work the day our town did the fireworks. He pulled 15 hours, gone from his family again. He spent his celebration time chasing cows, dealing with drug dealers, warrants and everything else. Still he was able to stop by where we were sitting to say hello before the fireworks started. Even in that moment he was my husband second and a cop first.

When a “civilian” stopped him with a question he had to stop being husband and father and be cop. The switch was so fast. He was cool and sexy and professional. I was left in the background. The whole time I was ready to cry. The person talking to him just kept on talking without a thought that this was the only time I would have a minute to see my husband all day. They didn’t care that it was rare for us to have a chance to see each other, it never occurs to other people that his job takes him to places where it’s posted “extreme danger: Stay Back!” That I worry even if it is something silly. That I go days without seeing him at all. He got a call on his radio and was gone before I could say goodbye.

He spends his days going to solve and help the issues of other families. We stay back until he can be dad and husband again. Out in public people only see his uniform. He is only a cop, nothing else to them. I see a father and a husband, the man I love. Still I have to share him.

In our small town everyone knows who the cops are, so even if he is out of uniform he is a cop to everyone in town. People don’t see the father, or the husband, they only see the cop. It is sad to be second at times, and yet it makes me so proud. No one sees it but, he is my husband!

A Cop's Date

T-rex and I got to go on a date last night. Transformers 3D. His whole shift was there, the PD’s shift was there, and the Emergency management guy was there. I guess to get the full picture you have to understand our town. We have one movie theater, with one screen, that is it. Prices are cheap and it is run by volunteers, we can get a large bucket of popcorn and two drinks for 7 bucks! I love it. But there is only one movie at a time. They do a good job at getting a good movie in. I love it.

You also have to understand our departments. There are 3 guys to a day, on each department. They make up that “shift.” They also change days they are working. So T-rex always works with the same guys. They have every other weekend off, every other Wednesday and Thursday off. It is the same for the Police Department. Every 6 weeks the guys change, so it is something like this: T-rex on days, Popeye on mids, and D on nights. After 6 weeks T-rex will be on mids, Popeye will be on Nights and D will be on Days. Same kind of thing for the PD only they change like every 4 weeks or something. We also have one emergency management guy, he is the one who lets us know that tornados are going to hit, and what to do when that happens.

So every officer who had the day off was at the theater. One guy even took the day off to go. We had literally half the police force sitting at the movie. Everyone made a point of telling us how the town was going to burn down. Everyone turned off their phones. When the movie was over all the guys got together outside to check their phones. . . oh just weather alerts. Good thing the emergency management guy was on it!

We had a great time, and it was good to see all the guys T-rex works with. If you have seen the other Transformers I say go out and see this one too, it was good. T-rex loved it!

I Am a Police Officer’s Wife . . . And Nothing Else?

The question was asked on one of the police wives forums that I go to a lot if we have ever ran into a wife who just didn’t care that her husband was a cop. The asker of the question and many of the responses seemed to point that yes we all have. But more disturbing to me was the fact that this trait was not good.

I have seen the other side of it. I have seen wives who become nothing but a cop’s wife. To me that is far sadder. Sure I am proud to be the wife of a Deputy, but there is far more to me than my husband’s job. I spend my day doing typical mom and wife stuff, well as typical as it can be when you are married to a cop. I run the kids to play dates, I go to school, I have dreams, and I hope someday to make some real money. My dreams are not tied to what might happen to my husband’s job.

I don’t go around with the “oh poor me! My husband is in danger!” kind of attitude. Even if I do share it here a lot! This is my place to vent, to talk about this PART of my life. This part does find a way to creep into every other part of my life. But I guess that is just piece of the life of a cop’s wife.

I am a cop’s wife, and I love it. I would not change it for anything. I love seeing my husband do what he was made to do. As any long time cop would tell you it is in their blood. It truly is. And as such I was born to be a cop’s wife. I get the stress, the danger and all of the other silly things that come with it. Most cops’ wives fall into two categories, the ones that were born for this and the ones who cannot stand it. Yet we all deal with it in different ways. Some just treat it like another job, and it is after all. Others take things too far. Their whole lives are about being married to a cop.

I am very proud of my husband and I will support him forever, but I am not going to stop living MY life the way I want to just because he is a cop. My advice, find balance. Our cops do need our support. But we also need to live our lives.

So I am a Police Officer’s Wife, but I am so much more too. I love it.

But truth is I don’t think the guys need near as much support as the wives do! This blog is not here to support the cops and their job. . . it is to support the wives and our job of dealing with the crazy, slightly demented mind that makes a great cop. And T-rex truly is a great cop.