Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Police Wife or Banker’s Wife

I have been trying to come up with a fair response to my last post (ME time), and truly most of what I have gotten is excuses. Oddly I am okay with that. I truly did write that post in a fit of frustration; at least I didn’t write about ALL things I was frustrated with….

But I did have to smile at the comments I got on that post. I am far from the wife and mother who think she can do it all. . .my first response to the comments was “wow you missed it all” and although I think things were miss it is only because I was just in whine mode.

I am far from the Do it all mom so many of us do try to be. Just ask anyone who has ever seen the mess I call a home! But there are stresses, and I do try my best. I cannot just blame this all on T-rex’s job as I am sure many other wives and mothers feel the total chaos at 3:45 when school gets out.

On the day that I posted my whine I was into day three that went something like this

3:30 ~ Get kids from school

3:45 Kids and I walk into the house to see that the dog made a mess in her crate.

Dino pointed out the dog also lost her tags, and shock collar (The dog is another stress all together!)

Lilly and Rae also ask within seconds of each other what is to eat.

3:46~ Dino asks what is to eat

I start to look for the collar for the dog

3:47 ~ T-rex calls, (At this point I have yet to even take off my coat)

I trip over a stick in the back yard looking for the dog collar

3:48~ Rae starts to yell that she wants the light on so she can pee

The dog starts to bark and will not stop

I am still on the phone with T-rex

Lilly demands I help her with home work

Dino Turns on the Tv even after being told on the ride home she cannot watch TV

3:49 ~ as I was only able to deal with about half of the issues they start again

Ray yells for the light

Lilly demands I read something, and then starts to tell me about her day at school

I get off the phone with T-rex

Dino asks for food in between counting to 50

3:50 ~ I give up on the dog’s collar

I pull out whatever snack I can find, Lilly does not like it and makes that clear

Rae will not put on her pants, so I deal with that some

3:51~ The fighting starts “Lilly is looking at me funny, Dino farted”

I spill the milk

At this point I am sure you can see how it went. It is not that I am busy trying to get everything done, it is that for about 45 minutes everything is total chaos. Add in a few checkbook mistakes that get caught during this time, and round it off with a new mess and tada! That is it. The rest of the day may go great, or like most I deal with little kids fighting. But the hour after school is a total mess.

I am sure I am not the only one who deals with this stress, and it just got too much for me the day I posted. I wanted to run away and hide until after dinner. I know that this is a feeling all mothers get from time to time, and no matter what T-rex’s job I would have wanted to trade him places.

I think one thing I am going to do to cure this is change my name from Mom to something the kids don’t know!


Pam Landy said...

Not gonna lie, that sounds hard. I'm sorry. It sounds like your kids are setting the tone, maybe? My mom's method of child control utilized setting expectations (do not talk to me while am on the phone) along with swift retribution if we disobeyed (getting off the phone immediately, stern talking-to or time-out). But I don't have any kids yet, and every family is different, and I know that it's a hell of a lot easier to say than to do. :(

John Rambo's Wife said...

Everyone is entitled to vent. I use my blog as a sounding board and place to process my thoughts. I think in writing. Sometimes I just need to get the jumble out of my head. You are also entitled to feel however you want to feel. Your life is your life. Sometimes its easy to read about someone else's life and say "oh, just do this, this and this" and it will be fine. The reality is you probably know exactly what to do and you know what your family needs best. Sometimes you just need a minute to say "Time out. I just need to catch my breath and refocus so that I can handle this zanny mess we call life."

I know I need those moments.

I find your blog honest and refreshing.

Thanks for sharing your life.

Meadowlark said...

As Pam mentioned, firm and fair always worked for me. THIS is acceptable, THIS is not. The consistency factor is the hardest! :) But once it's set up that they know where the appropriate snacks are, that if the TV comes on, they will not watch any for the rest of the day it gets better. Sorry you're in those tough phases where they're still testing your lines.