Lilly is in 1st grade now. She loves it, other than getting up early. She is just shy of evil in the morning, she gets that from me, so I understand.
She does really well in school. She can read a little, and write. She has to make her letters just right. Knowing Lilly’s personality I never did think she would get into a lot of trouble. Last year she did get in a little trouble for sticking her tongue out at the lunch lady. I don’t blame her there at all. They run the lunch room like a military base. I cried the one day I ate lunch with her. A little boy next to me got sent to the “bad kids” table, and as far as I could tell he didn’t do anything wrong. She told me about it, and how she told the teacher she was sorry. Really that was the only issue we ever had with her last year.
Well this year is not going so well already. She got “a stick pulled” I guess they pull a stick out of their cup or something. Green is for a warning, yellow is for last chance, and red is for no play time. She had to pull green. Because she was talking during calendar time.
Now Lilly is really shy. Part of me was happy she was talking with friends. I can’t help it; I guess I try to look at the good. In my head I did the whole soft music, butterfly’s song and dance “My kid has friends!”
But I could tell she was really upset about this. She did not look at me, she almost started to cry and she yelled at her sisters. I started to feel really bad for her. How could people be so mean as to make her pull a stick?!
We talked about it a little, and I said the bad thing a parent should never say. . “Well, I am disappointed in you.” But more on that later.
I could not bring myself to dish out a punishment, so I asked Lilly what she thought should happen. She said “I will not talk at home so I can practice being good in school.” I nearly died of laughter. But I didn’t see anything wrong with that idea. Even if I knew it would only last a few minutes. What a smart kid! She did have to tell her dad what happened. I feared T-rex would yell at her or ground her or worse yet tell her that he is disappointed in her! He didn’t. He was very cool about it. He always gets to be the cool parent.
When my mom called I asked Lilly if she wanted to talk to Grammy. Lilly put her head down and mumbled no. She was still too upset. But Grammy talked to her and told Lilly that no matter what Grammy, Papa, Mom and Dad will always love her. I really think Lilly needed that. Well, almost. Lilly made a point of saying she didn’t have to run any laps, or stay in from play time. It was only the green stick after all.
Then T-rex and I got to talk and I told him how I told Lilly I was disappointed. And once I repeated it to another person I felt like the world’s worst mom! T-rex almost flipped out! “How can you say that, I would take a beating, yelling, cursing, and grounding, anything over the D word!!!”
I started to bust up laughing! Mostly because he was right! I told myself I would never tell my kids I was disappointed in them, and yet here I was. I told my sweet child that she failed me. I think that is part of why she was so upset today. Well I would have been. But I really was disappointed in her; she never gets into trouble like that. If it was Dino I would have asked if that was all she got into today. Each kid is different and Lilly is not my typical trouble maker.
Well worst parent award or not, we kept talking about it today. She decided to make her teacher a little card that said “I am sorry for talking in class.” We talked about why we should not talk in class, and we went over calendar time stuff again. I also told her how very proud of her I was. How proud of her for telling me right away that she got a stick pulled, and how no matter what I still love her. I hope that the love is what is lasting, not my disappointment. I know she is only 6 and learning a lot. Looks like we both learned a lesson from her run in with the law. Pray for me, Dino is only in her second week of school!