Monday, August 23, 2010

Worth more dead than alive

Is it sad that T-rex is worth more money dead then he is alive? Is it sad that I know this? Now this is only true if he were to die on the job. I think if he were to be so rude as to pass away when off work I would dress him in his uniform, place him in his car, and call him into work before letting anyone know he has passed away.

I know morbid right! Yet we had to have that talk today. I sit here alone at home, with the stress that something might happen to him. I had no clue what would happen if he were to die. I have never dealt with a close loved one dying. Never.

I almost felt bad for telling him he better die at work. He said it’s okay because Mighty Mouse has been told the same thing! I really wonder if that is some sick thing police wives do to deal with the constant stress? I fear we are picking up our husbands unusual humor.

I really hate talking about death. I feel for anyone who has lost a loved one. I cannot fully understand that pain. I think that is why I never knew what would happen if T-rex passed away. I think I liked not knowing. I liked when we never talked about it. But when he is off learning this stuff in class he wants to talk to me about it. Would it be so rude for me to tell him I don’t care? Ugh! I will just tell him nothing bad better happen. But then again he never listens to me anyway.


jediwife said...

I definitely think being cops' wives places us in some weird positions and forces us to think about things that most people would rather not think about. I hate the life insurance conversation, too.

Ann T. said...

Dear Yellow,
Although my husband was not a cop, I did have to confront this issue. Let me just say, whine about stuff like life insurance all you want--I did and still do. I hate that stuff.

But it does make a difference. Earning opportunities suck for women who are grieving. They have so much emotional stuff to take care of, their own and their family's. You want your kids to go to college no matter what. Things like that.

Sorry if I am a downer, but I've spent two weeks on death and sickness papers. I remember how horrible it was, the weird position it was and is still. In the end, it meant that my husband spent less on himself in order to plan for his family.

Oh, ick. I sound like a suit.

Hang in,
Ann T.